


Daisy, Dandelion

by PhoenixandMuser



Series: Gardenia [2]
Category: Mystic Messenger (Video Game)
Genre: Alternate Universe - Canon Divergence, F/M, Gen
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-01-08
Updated: 2018-01-08
Packaged: 2019-03-01 22:53:22
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,243
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/13305054
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/PhoenixandMuser/pseuds/PhoenixandMuser
Summary: Taking a walk on a warm spring day.





	Daisy, Dandelion

This situation is not ideal. In detail, it is so far removed from how I dreamed it… I'm sick, imprisoned, and still at the mercy of others, as I have always been. But, at its core, the essence of this moment is everything I wished for. I wouldn't dare complain.

There are a few wispy clouds that slowly unfurl like ribbons as they are blown across the sky. I can barely look away from the fresh blue expanses of mid-morning.

The hospital gardens are mostly quiet. There are a few other patients dotted around the grounds, with family, or with nurses, but they rarely cause disruption. While I would prefer to have the garden to myself, to share only with her, I find that I am not terribly unsettled by the presence of others anymore.

I look down at her. Her hands clasp my arm tenderly, allowing me to lead her on our aimless stroll. After a few seconds, she looks up at me. She graces me with a serene, comforting smile, and waits for me to speak. In all honesty, there was nothing I had to say. I only wanted to watch her walk peacefully at my side. Instead, I stop to place a kiss on her forehead, and then resume watching the clouds. 

In an ideal world, I could stray further than hospital premises. I could wander through scarcely known meadows with her on my arm, or keep my own garden and cut fresh roses to surprise her with, and lie on picnic blankets until the sun sets.   
This life is so far removed from my idyllic daydreams. Resentment and despair flooded my weak, pathetic, damaged body. I so badly wanted to shriek and howl until all the frustration passed. Still, she walked beside me, unaware, and peacefully enjoying the warm spring day.

For now, I could keep a calm exterior. However, it will not be long before I become too tired to continue, so I lead her away from the path and invite her to sit beneath a tree with me.

The soft green grass is littered with tiny blooms. Daisies peek out amidst the blades, and then a few dandelions stretching taller.   
I pick a daisy and twirl its dainty stem between my fingers.   
"There's a game people sometimes play," I speak quietly, not wanting to startle her. "They pick the petals off, one by one, like telling a fortune. 'They love me, they love me not.' Just alternating until all the petals are gone…"  
She reaches for the flower in my hand, but I move it further away without thinking. "No… what if the result is upsetting?"  
"Saeran…" she sighs, and I immediately curse myself for letting my thoughts slip out. She takes the flower from me, and settles against my side, allowing me to wrap my arm around her shoulders. As if someone as pathetic and fearful as me could ever make her feel safe. 

I watch her pluck at the silky white petals. Suddenly, I feel jealous, longing to take the bloom's place, being caressed, toyed with, and torn apart by her delicate fingers. I glare at it, and its sunny yellow face smiles back at me, taunting me, prodding at a vicious temper hiding deep within. 

"He loves me not…"

The petals are sparse now. I wonder if it's so irrational to feel like nature is deliberately trying to agitate me. I start trying to count how many petals remain.

"He loves me…"

Will I upset her if I snatched the foul thing away before it sunk seeds of doubt into her mind to take root? 

"He loves me not."

There are no petals left. She looks up at me with wide eyes, shining with worry.

Vile, evil, ugly things. I could sink my nails into the ground and tear every single repulsive one out of the mud. I would shred them beyond recognition.

I want to burn this place to ashes. It is nothing but worthless scrubland compared to the garden I could grow for her. 

She casually flicks the remnant away, and takes my hand in hers. It is only now that I realise how tightly my fists are clenched and that I am gritting my teeth.

"We're one short, so I'll give you one to make up for it." Before I can question her, she leans in closer and places a light kiss on the very corner of my lips. 

With such a simple gesture, my fear dissipates. As clarity dawn on me once more, I feel small. My eyes start to sting, and a lump forms in my throat. I wonder if I will ever be stable enough to be someone she can depend on. Will I ever be anything more than a burden, a temperamental child to be soothed?

I can't help myself, as I hide my face in my hands, and curl up smaller. I rest my head on her lap and try to regain some semblance of composure. After a few seconds, I feel her fingers brush over my hair, slowly, consistently, predictably…  
"I'm really trying." My voice is thin, and cracked. I doubt it made my case very well, but she continued, regardless.

 

"Sae… Saeran…are you awake?"

I roll onto my back, slowly opening my eyes. She's peering down at me cautiously. Above her, branches adorned with fresh green leaves and flowerbuds obscure the clear sky. Daisy chains rest in a crown on her head, and drape over her shoulders. Although it stings my chapped lips, I can't hold back a smile. I reach up to cup her chin in my hand.  
"You look even more like a princess than usual."

This makes her smile, and I feel strangely proud. I stretch my arms above my head, still resting in her lap, and let my fingers brush through the grass. 

"You slept for a while… I started to worry that I should have taken you back inside."

I shake my head. "I'm okay. I'm sorry for getting upset." 

"Still, we probably shouldn't stay outside too much longer."

I look up into her eyes again. "Do you ever… miss Magenta? Not Rika, or Mint Eye's ideologies… just… having a place that could have been our home. Eating together, working together, sitting in our own garden together…"

"Saeran…"

I don't allow her to finish chastising me. "Do you think we could ever have that? Would you want that? To be at home with me? I can get better… I won't weigh you down forever."

She reaches out and tugs a dandelion from the ground. Most of them are still flowering, but the odd few have become fluffy dandelion clocks. I prop myself up on my elbows, and she holds it in front of me. Her free hand covers my eyes. 

"You're not weighing me down, Sae. Let's wish for it."

It sounds like a promise. I inhale deeply then blow steadily, wishing upon the airborne seeds.   
"Did I get them all?"

She laughs at this. "You did. Good job."

As pathetic as it may be, I feel pride swell in my chest again.

Eventually, we have to return to my hospital room. I offer my arm to her, which she accepts with a smile, and she rests her head against my shoulder. As we walk, those same tiny flowers nested in the grass smile up at us. I feel as if we're looked kindly upon for a change.

**Author's Note:**

> Daisy- innocence, purity, cheerfulness  
> Dandelion - a gift to a loved one; happiness, total faithfulness


End file.
